Dearest friends, family and fearless readers, Letters to Jonah is going to be changing a bit. I am still going to write letters to Jonah, of course, because that’s what this blog was started for, and that’s what still heals me the most <3 However, I’m also going to start writing more about…well, life. Right now, life is weird and…
Good morning, world. Today, March 29th, 2017, was Jonah’s due date. This was the day we were hoping to have our son in our arms by. When we were initially given our due date, I remember Colin being concerned that the baby would come during March Madness. I alleviated his fears by telling him we could have basketball on during…
Dear Jonah, I’ve been doing better these past couple of days, even though your due date is quickly approaching. Today, it has been 9 weeks since I delivered you, and in 3 days, you were due. At this nine week mark, my grief is changing. It’s not quite as raw and stabbing…I still experience those stabs sometimes, but now it’s…
I recently discovered Bella Grace Magazine, and I definitely recommend it for loss moms. It’s beautiful, positive, and community-driven. Content in the magazine is submitted by readers, so it’s a really eclectic mix of stuff. There are also prompts in it, which have been fun! Anyway, I read the term “strong in the softest of ways” in the magazine a…
Dear Jonah, This is going to be a hard letter for me to write, but I feel in my heart that it’s time. Tonight, I want to talk to you about how perfect and beautiful you are. Before I get to that, though, I have to mention how angry I am with my body. I’m trying very, very hard…
I love my journal. I keep it with me all the time, and I attempt to write at least a sentence in it every day. I also love writing here on my Letters to Jonah blog, but the experience of sitting quietly with paper and a pen is just completely different. It can be done outside on a bench,…
Dear Jonah, This is going to be a short and sweet message…I hope you like it 🙂 I know that my deep grief is there because of my immense love for you. I know that those two feelings will never be separated, but over time, I’ll start feeling the love first and foremost, rather than the crushing grief. Well, guess…
Before losing Jonah, I’m not sure I had even heard the term “self-care.” Yes, I tried to take care of my needs and do what made me happy, but it wasn’t something I thought about as much – it was more just something that happened naturally. When I became a loss mom and fell into the deep, dark hole…
Dear Jonah, I’m having a difficult night tonight. This morning and afternoon were ok, but my mood just kept getting worse as the day wore on. Now, even after my lavender bubble bath, I’m just having a rough time. I just feel…weary. I’m weary of grief. I’m weary of this new life of loss that I’m living. Nobody should be…
Dear Jonah, When I was driving home the other day, I heard this song play on the radio and it really spoke to me and made me think. Well…besides the getting high and stoned part 😉 Here’s the song: First of all, let me say that I am mildly religious, but have had a hard time finding a connection to my…
